This Thorn

"If you have not slept, or if you have slept, or if you have a headache, or sciatica, or leprosy, or thunderstroke, I beseech you, by all angels, to hold your peace, and not pollute the morning." Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have had fibromyalgia since 2001. The flares of pain come and go based on things I can control to some extent and sometimes with no explanation at all. Last night I spent a sleepless night because my right shoulder has shooting pains which make it almost impossible to find a position that doesn't hurt. This morning I am extremely tired and can barely lift Danica. When I begin a cycle of pain like this I am tempted to be disgruntled. What purpose does this continual physical trial have in my life?

Twila Paris sings a song about gratefulness for a thorn in her life. I rose from bed and prayed about my response to how I am feeling and then searched for this song on my ipod. I meditated on these words:

Thank you for this thorn embedded in my flesh
I can feel the mystery, my spirit is made fresh
You are sovereign still and forever wise
I can see the miracle opening my eyes

To a proud heart so quick to judge
Laying down crosses and carrying grudges
The veil has been torn
And I thank you for this thorn

Thank you for this thorn fellowship of pain
Teaching me to know you more never to complain
Thank You for this love planted in my side
Faithful patient miracle opening my eyes

I never thought I'd say it without reservation
But I am truly grateful for this piercing revelation
Of a proud heart so quick to judge
Laying down crosses and carrying grudges
The veil has been torn
And I thank you for this thorn

And if You chose to take it, I will praise You
And thank You for the healing in Your name
But if it must remain, I thank You for Your rod
Evidence of Father-love for a child of God

I join You in sorrow
So much less than You have borne
And I thank you, really I thank You
Lord I thank You, I thank You for this thorn

I am constantly amazed at how the first hour of my morning sets the tone for my heart and life that day. Thank You for this thorn of fibro and the lessons it continuously teaches me about Your love for me. Give me the strength and grace to bear the fruit of Your Spirit as I present my body a living sacrifice to You.