Baby's Laughter

When the first baby laughed for the first time, the laugh broke into a thousand pieces and they all went skipping about, and that was the beginning of fairies. And now when every new baby is born its first laugh becomes a fairy.
-- James Matthew Barrie

"Books may well be the only true magic." Alice Hoffman

Some of the best memories of my childhood come from the hours my sisters and I spent at the Staunton Public Library. My mom would take us every week and we would fill our bags with new word worlds to explore. The library was a hallowed place for me, and the librarians were some of the smartest people I could imagine because they knew how to get to any piece of information I could ever want. I became an avid reader. Even before Delaney was born I imagined sharing my love of reading with her. My baby shower for her was a book theme and the guests each brought their favorite childhood book to begin Delaney's own library. I can honestly say reading with her is my favorite thing we do together. Now Delaney is reading on her own. She no longer stumbles over words and the pleasure she gets from moving quickly and confidently from page to page is palpable.

This morning we made our weekly trek to the public library. Delaney has made fast friends with the librarian and takes her a piece of art each time we go. She is allowed to choose 10 books, half of which have to be non-fiction, and 2 magazines and 3 movies. I watched her today as she purposefully made her selections. Her non fiction choices included a book on what it's like to be an earthworm, a book on weather and a kids cookbook. (She is really interested in cooking lately.) She also chose an art book that takes you step by step through drawing insects. This is the first book she ran to open when we got home, and she drew on a huge piece of art paper an entire family of bugs. I love to see the fiction books she chooses because she is drawn to books with beautiful illustrations or photography. The title or theme of the fiction books seem secondary to the aesthetics. She is so excited to ask the librarian for help if she wants to find a book on a certain subject, even getting them through interlibrary loan if our library doesn't have them. Then she runs behind the counter to help scan the books and check them out. This will be her first summer taking part in the summer reading program, and she can hardly wait for the kick off next week.

One of the movies we picked together is Summer Magic, you know the old Disney movie with Hayley Mills? Dan is gone for the weekend in South Carolina, so we have plans to snuggle in the big bed and watch this movie tonight with popcorn. I think we both can't wait for bedtime! As Delaney grows I see more and more of myself in her. I love sharing the absolute joy that comes from learning and loving to read. I love sharing the wonderment of the library experience.

Thank you for the reflection of myself in my dear daughter, a reminder to allow for the possibilities each new day holds.

No Poor Indifferent Place

If your everyday life seems poor, don't blame it;
blame yourself;
admit to yourself that you are not enough of a poet to call forth its riches;
because for the creator there is no poverty and no poor indifferent place.

-Rainer Maria Rilke

Some people come into our lives . . .

"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for while, leave footprints in our hearts, and we are never the same."

Delaney graduated from Kindergarten on Wednesday morning. This is a picture of her with her dear teacher, Mrs. Vaudrin. When I think of all the changes and uncertainty my brave girl went through this past year I immediately think of this amazing woman. Laurie stepped in as a surrogate mother to Delaney while she was living here, and I was in the hospital. Although she was dealing with so many trials of her own, including aging parents and her own husband's health problems, she always took the extra time to champion Delaney, to comfort her when she was lonely or afraid and love her. I know Delaney will never forget her.

I truly believe the first years of education are the most critical. They provide the foundation for how our children feel about learning and how they perceive themselves academically and socially. Delaney has been so blessed to not only have two amazing years at White Flint Montessori, molding her into a kind friend, a confident leader and diligent learner, but now this year at Lake Center reinforcing those qualities with an even greater message of God's love.

At the graduation each child was not only recognized for academic achievements but given a certificate for a character trait they specifically exemplify. I loved this focus on not just what they are learning but who they are becoming as people. Delaney's character trait was "cheerfulness." My mom and I joke often about how Delaney is like a little bird, chirping from the first moment she wakes in the morning. I felt so proud because, as much as I worry about how the many changes of our life may have affected her, I see how happy she is and no mother could really ask for more!

Thank you for Mrs. Vaudrin and her lasting ministry to mine and other's children. I am so grateful for my dear daughter, so full of joy and the love of life. Please protect her tender heart as she grows.

Enough

"God is not glorified if the foundation of our gratitude is the worth of the gift and not the excellency of the Giver. If gratitude is not rooted in the beauty of God before the gift, it is probably disguised idolatry. May God grant us a heart to delight in him for who he is so that all our gratitude for his gifts will be the echo of our joy in the excellence of the Giver!" John Piper, A Godward Life

I have been living on manna for over a year now. Since I lost my job last April and all through my pregnancy, recovery and our move here to Ohio God was teaching me the important lesson of waking each morning and rejoicing I had what I needed for that day because of His provision. I know we all do it, but I think I am particularly prone to becoming attached to things. I love beautiful clothes and handbags. I love beautiful furniture and linens. These things have always been a way for me to reflect to others who I am. Not all I am but certainly one part of me. I justified the value I placed on them because I felt they reflected my care and good taste and diligent work. I also subconsciously always felt I deserved these things.

During this last move I once again, out of necessity, had to sell some things that I thought were very important to me. I sold my big white French country bed, I sold my bookcases, my china hutch and my ash table which I always joked my grandchildren would fight over. My books are still in boxes in the basement. I still have windows without treatments. Only the absolutely necessary dishes are in the cupboards instead of the beautiful and sentimental ones and our bed is on rails. So I struggle with the idea of having ENOUGH. After over a year of no "disposable" income, you begin to see your socks are more than a little thin, you haven't added one new thing to your wardrobe, the towels are frayed and there is not really a day in the future when you can see beginning to shop again or replenish the things you lost. I would be lying if I didn't admit I become disgruntled at times and discontent, but during this purging process the empty space left by the things has been filled with manna for my soul.

My dad asked me the other day how we were doing, and I laughed as I answered him. We are good. I feel blessed because we can afford the groceries we need. We have health. We have relationships full of meaning. Most importantly we have a deeper knowledge of the Giver of all gifts. In the words of Chris Tomlin's song Enough,

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

Thank you for emptying my mind and heart and life to be filled with ENOUGH.

Life with Laney Jayne

Our sweet girl Laney has had such a full life lately. Friday she handed in a beach house she and Dan made together. The project instructions were to study different kinds of homes from around the world and choose one to build from recycled materials found around our house. Of course, the best house Delaney could imagine was the Avon, NC beach house we stayed in for her fourth birthday with 15 bedrooms and an elevator! She was so proud.

Yesterday was such a fun day for her. She and my mom ran, that's right, RAN, a one mile race together. Delaney said loudly to my mom as they crossed the finish line mid way in the pack, "You're a pretty fast runner for an old lady!" When they returned home they spent some time hanging out in the hammock in our back yard. My dad was here helping mow our very large yard since Dan had to work and then he and mom took Laney to buy two swings for our swing set. She has already spent hours back there swinging her heart out! Later last night my mom came back over to watch the girls so Dan and I could have a date and she got even more time with her grandma.

Only two more days of school left. She will graduate Kindergarten on Wednesday morning. All I can say sometimes is "What a kid!" I watched her excitedly wash the cars with Dan today and then dig for worms and hold them in her hands. I watched as she helped me bake a cream cheese pound cake this evening, so thrilled to crack the eggs and hold the beaters. When we snuggled into bed I read her the fairy tale Snow White and Rose Red from her big Grimm's treasury, and I watched her imagining the details because there are no pictures and could tell she was really in the forest with those girls.

Thank you for my girl, such a perfect mix of princess and tomboy; such a friend and companion; my love; my joy; my Laney.

If I Do Nothing Else

When Dan and I renewed our vows almost two years ago one of the lines I wrote that has been my mantra since is, "If I do nothing else but love you and Delaney well, it will be enough." Of course that includes our sweet Danica now. Thursday I was feeling overwhelmed by a multitude of things, not the least of which was the sense of my isolation with my work at home career and just feeling a little frumpy in general having had very little time or resources to spend on my outward appearance. My old real estate marketing friends were emailing me about the MAME celebration in DC that night which usually included for me a great dress and shoes, a hotel room, a wonderful dinner and drinks and a great time celebrating mine and other's professional accomplishments. I was also mourning with the Chapman family and made a play list with all Steven's music. The song "One little heartbeat at a time" came on and stopped me in my tracks.

Thank you for showing me that loving my family is MORE than enough for me right now and exactly what I should be doing.

Please play the montage below to hear the beautiful song.

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com